arym.

I know I’m completely done giving a shit about you, but I like how you act like I never was apart of your life. I swear, people just don’t ever appreciate the shit I do for them. I understand you’ve made new friends, you got priorities, AND you’ve forgotten about me. But does that give you a reason to make me feel like I was worth nothing? Who was there to help you through the hard times when SHE always let you down? Who was there when you needed someone to be by your side when nobody else was? Who was there to tell all the people to ‘fuck off’ when people talked shit about you? Who was there through all the drama you went through? Who was there when you felt like nobody cared about you? Oh yeah! That was me. I was there all the fucking time. But ya know, as life goes on - you come to realize what assholes you actually became friends with. 

I know I’m completely done giving a shit about you, but I like how you act like I never was apart of your life. I swear, people just don’t ever appreciate the shit I do for them. I understand you’ve made new friends, you got priorities, AND you’ve forgotten about me. But does that give you a reason to make me feel like I was worth nothing? Who was there to help you through the hard times when SHE always let you down? Who was there when you needed someone to be by your side when nobody else was? Who was there to tell all the people to ‘fuck off’ when people talked shit about you? Who was there through all the drama you went through? Who was there when you felt like nobody cared about you? Oh yeah! That was me. I was there all the fucking time. But ya know, as life goes on - you come to realize what assholes you actually became friends with. 

Day 1: A few things you will never forget in 2010.

• So much unnecessary drama.
• Going to Landstown for a week & a half and hating it.
• SUMMER !
• Meeting many new Norfolk heads + people in general.
• Flings/letdowns with boys.
• Meeting my new bestfriend. <3
• Making more friends at Salem. 
• The big break-up. 
• Running away. 
• Realizing how strong of a person I am. (emotionally/mentally) 

Day 2: Relationship(s).

• Christian Bagtas.
• Rob Garris. 

Day 3: The best day.

• I’ve had numerous BEST days. :)

Day 4: The worst day. 

• Running away :|

Day 5: The most memorable moment.

• Uly’s surprise birthday party. <3

Day 6: Your best friend(s).

• Gloria Morales
• Gabby Duque
• Heidi Rosario
• Justice Favila 

Day 7: Your birthday.

• Birthday dinner @ Macaroni Grill.
• Walked around Town Center with friends.
• Movie at my house.
• Sleepover with the bestfriend.

Day 8: The funest day.

• PIBNA tournament ! :)

Day 9: The end of last school year/the beginning of this one.

•  Finally out of Salem ! :)
•  Fuck, I hate Landstown. LOL 

Day 10: New Year resolutions.

Mmm, I’ve blogged about this before but:

• Get better grades even though I already have decent grades.
• Sign up for behind the wheel.
• Eat healthier / go on jogs.
• Become closer with family.
• Find a job! 

Day 1: A few things you will never forget in 2010.

• So much unnecessary drama.
• Going to Landstown for a week & a half and hating it.
• SUMMER !
• Meeting many new Norfolk heads + people in general.
• Flings/letdowns with boys.
• Meeting my new bestfriend. <3
• Making more friends at Salem. 
• The big break-up. 
• Running away. 
• Realizing how strong of a person I am. (emotionally/mentally) 

Day 2: Relationship(s).

• Christian Bagtas.
• Rob Garris. 

Day 3: The best day.

• I’ve had numerous BEST days. :)

Day 4: The worst day. 

• Running away :|

Day 5: The most memorable moment.

• Uly’s surprise birthday party. <3

Day 6: Your best friend(s).

• Gloria Morales
• Gabby Duque
• Heidi Rosario
• Justice Favila 

Day 7: Your birthday.

• Birthday dinner @ Macaroni Grill.
• Walked around Town Center with friends.
• Movie at my house.
• Sleepover with the bestfriend.

Day 8: The funest day.

• PIBNA tournament ! :)

Day 9: The end of last school year/the beginning of this one.

•  Finally out of Salem ! :)
•  Fuck, I hate Landstown. LOL 

Day 10: New Year resolutions.

Mmm, I’ve blogged about this before but:

• Get better grades even though I already have decent grades.
• Sign up for behind the wheel.
• Eat healthier / go on jogs.
• Become closer with family.
• Find a job! 

I have an obsession with stripes, literally. I have so much shirts that have stripes on them, it’s not even funny. Whenever I shop, stripes just draws so much attention to my eyes. I have no idea why either. If ya ever need a hook up with a striped shirt, I got you ! LOL, jk. My striped shirts are for my use only, sorry buddy. 

I’m done caring for people who clearly don’t care about me. I care too much about other people when all they feed me back is bullshit. I’m never satisfied with myself alone, I always have a tendency of caring about other people’s satisfaction rather than my own. From now on - I’m gonna care more about myself, close friends, and family. Other than that, nobody else really means anything to me anymore. Until you can prove to me that you’re worth my time, then cool. Otherwise, I despise everyone, especially boys. 

You’re really giving me more reasons as to why I truly hate boys. You were supposed to turn that around and prove me wrong. It’s not that I expected you to, but I just thought and trusted that you would be the one to do that. You’ve just been making me so mad lately. I just don’t even know anymore. I can’t fall off the edge of my ‘don’t get my hopes up’ mindset, but it seems I already have since I actually care about talking to you this much. Whatever, I’m tired of this. 

yummmia:

People wonder why I’m so insecure.. want to know why? Because every time I end up close to someone, they leave me for someone better. Just imagine how hurt that is going to make me feel.. I end up feeling worthless, stupid, ugly, dumb, etc. I can’t trust anyone anymore because of this. It hurts too much to give someone my all just for them to do that to me.

THIS.

I’m probably the only one who has no motivation to go play in the snow. I know this is a once in a lifetime thing that Virginia ever gets THIS much snow .. but I’m just lazy as I don’t know what. Plus, I’d rather be getting this unnecessary shitload of homework done since I have nothing better to do. Oh well, have a nice snow day guuuys. :)

Ya know, it’s really nice having all this snow. I’ve always wanted a white Christmas. But now that the day’s almost over, it’s starting to stick, and it’s pouring heavily .. it better not freakin’ stick to the roads. I have plans tomorrow, and I don’t need this snow ruining it. Couldn’t you just wait till school was near? -___- 

I think it’s funny how whenever I see one of my girl friend’s and they’re with their boyfriend .. I look at the boy debating whether or not to give him a hug. Then I usually skip right past the boy and just give the girl a hug, because I don’t want the girl to get mad. Am I the only one who’s ever thought that way? 

There really should be no reason as to why I should care so much. Ya know, since I’m on that ‘don’t get my hopes up’ mindset. It’s really hard especially knowing how easily I fall for someone though. I know I don’t like you quite yet, but I like your personality. It’s nice talking to you, and it’s nice having someone to look forward to talking to each day. I’m not gonna hope for anything and expect anything out of you like I did with the past. But you’re nice, and I like that. 

They’re just uncomfortable to me now. It’s all about the jeggings! :)

• GET BETTER GRADES! (I know I have good grades to begin with, but I know I can still do a WHOLE lot better)
• Start eating healthier, and stop eating so much fast food.
• Start going on daily jogs when it gets warmer.
• Try out for tennis, maybe.
• Find a job, ASAP!
• Sign up for behind the wheel soooon.
• Be nicer to my family/get along better. - I know this is gonna be the hardest one, but I know I can do it. I really do love my family no matter how distant we truly are. 

A guy who actually gives a damn about school is such a turn on to me. He got his head in the books, cares about his grades, and actually puts effort into school .. that is the most attractive thing ever. I honestly believe ANY guy can be like this, but only few actually try. In those select few, I give you mad props. That’s a plus in my book. 

gloriamorales:

Isn’t my Bestfriend sexy ? Chyeaaah brrrro ! ;)

<33

It really bothers me when people talk about buying each other Christmas presents for other people and whatnot. I want to get so many people stuff, but I’m broke as shit. It’s not even funny. I always tell myself I want a job, but I haven’t done anything about it. And plus if I did get one or TRY to get one, it’s not like they’d magically hire me right before the holidays. I have so much stuff in mind to get people, but where’s the money? Nowhere. I know I save up money from not eating lunch and shit, but that’s not enough. I feel so bad, and I hate it. I know my dad is nice enough to give me money when I ask for it sometimes, but that just makes me feel even worse. I don’t want to use his money when I did nothing to deserve it. 

On top of that, I never have money to just shop for myself. Knowing how low my self-esteem is sometimes, it sucks not being able to buy myself new clothes. I don’t even bother asking my parents to buy me clothes. I’m kinda just like ‘fuck-it’ when it comes to shopping for myself nowadays. Then that’s when I start to feel ugly as I don’t know what, always repeating outfits and whatnot. It even gets to the point where I constantly ask people to borrow clothes because I just feel so bum. Ya’ll who have parents that give you money just-like-that, consider yourself lucky. 

It really bothers me when people talk about buying each other Christmas presents for other people and whatnot. I want to get so many people stuff, but I’m broke as shit. It’s not even funny. I always tell myself I want a job, but I haven’t done anything about it. And plus if I did get one or TRY to get one, it’s not like they’d magically hire me right before the holidays. I have so much stuff in mind to get people, but where’s the money? Nowhere. I know I save up money from not eating lunch and shit, but that’s not enough. I feel so bad, and I hate it. I know my dad is nice enough to give me money when I ask for it sometimes, but that just makes me feel even worse. I don’t want to use his money when I did nothing to deserve it. 

On top of that, I never have money to just shop for myself. Knowing how low my self-esteem is sometimes, it sucks not being able to buy myself new clothes. I don’t even bother asking my parents to buy me clothes. I’m kinda just like ‘fuck-it’ when it comes to shopping for myself nowadays. Then that’s when I start to feel ugly as I don’t know what, always repeating outfits and whatnot. It even gets to the point where I constantly ask people to borrow clothes because I just feel so bum. Ya’ll who have parents that give you money just-like-that, consider yourself lucky. 

christinanguy3n:

Accept my many flaws and learn how to live with it. I’m never satisfied of who I am and what I have. I am always wanting or wishing for more when it’s not necessary. Other people can’t love me unless I learn how to love myself. Maybe that’s why I go through people so quickly, not cause I am picky or have high standards, it’s cause I don’t know how to accept people yet, not even myself.

I have come to hate all boys. Forreal tho, I just seem to get hurt all the time. I know ALL boys aren’t like that, but as far as I know .. I haven’t met anyone to prove me wrong. I know there were some boys out there who really were sweet, and who really did care. But from what I’ve been seeing lately, they’re just all the same. I could care less now. I don’t see the point in getting my hopes up anymore. Some great guy comes my way— Cool. If not— It’s whatever. 

These days where I have absolutely nothing to do, nobody to talk to & you know what I do during that spare time? Watch my endless youtube videos of girls cutting their hair, curling their hair, straightening it, or anything that inspires me to do something different with my hair. I haven’t watched these videos since summer. It’s quite interesting/relaxing actually. 

1. Hey you. You are and forever will be my bestfriend/sister. I know we’ve grown so far apart, and I know things aren’t the greatest between us as of now .. but I do love you. Don’t ever get the thought that I’ve replaced you or that I just don’t care anymore because I certainly care a whole lot about you. We’re still mending things between us, and it isn’t getting better as quick as I wish. But, only time and effort will bring us closer. I guess we’ll just have to wait it out and hope for the best, yeah?

2. I don’t hate you whatsoever. You probably think I highly despise you or just want you to go jump off a bridge or something .. but you’re wrong. I hate the actions you’ve been making, not YOU in general. You were like an older brother to me and I guess the loss of you as a friend just really hit me. You were like the ‘older brother I never had’. I’ve always wanted to be close with my siblings, but since I couldn’t do that with them .. I was able to do that with you. And I miss that, a lot.

3. I really miss you. ): I miss talking to you everyday, and falling asleep on the phone together. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret what I did. But I just miss talking to you. I’ve always wanted to text/call you to see how you’re doing, but I always get the feeling you hate me. I’m sorry for doing what I did. I still care about you though, in case you ever wondered.

4. I hate you so much. I say this everytime I see your picture or hear your name. You hurt me so much, you don’t even know. I still get jealous whenever I see you talk to another girl. I know I shouldn’t be, but I just don’t know how to lose these feelings for you. And I just hate it sooo much. I’ve tried so hard, trust me. 

5. You are nothing short of amazing, and I say that out of all truth. You have given me a reason for why I actually like Salem this year. You are such a great friend to me, and I couldn’t thank you enough for always being here for me. You know just what to say to everything and we understand each other. ilysomuch. <3

6. You’re like an older sister to me, and I like that a lot. I’ve always wanted an ‘older sister’ figure around. I like how you always tell me your little stories about us hanging out when we were little but I don’t remember any of them. You’re always so nice to me, and I love that. I know we haven’t exactly ‘clicked’ or gotten into deep conversations yet, but I hope I’ll be able to open up to you one day because you seem like a good listener. And I love people I can confide in and tell everything to. 

I don’t know why a numerous amount of ya’ll are complaining about a make-up day cause this snow. Can you just chill out and enjoy the fact we get a break from school? And stop complaining about, “Omg we should have just had school because I have no plans and my life is about to end because I’m so bored in this house, fml.” Uh no. Why don’t you just take your butt to bed and sleep all day. It’s not even that serious, buddy. And then when we DON’T have school cancelled, ya’ll are gonna complain like .. “Omg, Virginia Beach sucks because school is never cancelled, wtf !” 

Forreal tho, shuuuutup.

I haven’t had such a good Monday until today. Usually Mondays are the worst for me. I just want to get the day over with, go home, and sleep! But with all the snow, it was quite fun. We had a snowball fight in the parking lot right after school with Gloria, Melissa, Brehanna, Chris, Paolo & Brehon. Afterwards we went to Gino’s (pizza place) & that sure filled me up. Then we dropped people off, went to Skinny Dip, then home! Also, today’s my momma’s birthday. Sooo, Happy Birthday, Mom! Mmm, such a good day. :) 

Me: I want to spoil my boyfriend and buy him everything he wants.
Gloria: What boyfriend, Myra? 
Me: Shutup, IF I had one I would. 
Gloria: With what money? You have no job.

-___- I swear, she crushes my dreams all the time. 

On the real, I want to be a shoe head. I want to show that I’m not all ‘girly girl’, & boots/gladiators aren’t all I wear. I want to be part of all the boy talk & actually know what half you guys talk about. Too bad all I can do is fantasize right about now cos I’m broke as a bxtch. Smh ! -__-